Potty Training

That should probably be in quotes because I don't think much training will be going on for some time. But, we are trying to get the potty introduced with Bennett. My feeling is the earlier he is familiar with it, the better. One of the mom's in the Meetup group I am in has a son that is a month younger than Bennett. They have consistently been putting him on the toilet since he was 7 months old and he has no problem going on it. She told me that they were really committed one day last week and put him on every 90 minutes. His diaper was dry all day.

I am not that into it at this point. I just want to get him used to the idea. He is already obsessed with the regular toilet. I got him his own a couple of weeks ago and have had him sit on it before baths. No pushing. I just set him down and he gets off when he wants (with lots of praise when he sits of course). He has been playing with it constantly and sitting on it for longer periods of time. Today I got him up from his nap and put him straight on it and voila! There was pee...a very exciting development.

Ok, I suppose that is enough potty talk for one day. Happy Sunday.

There are flowers coming up in my garden

And that excites me very much. In reality there have been flowers somehow surviving out there for an entire year but now the lilies are coming up. It's a sure sign of spring. Hopefully I plan the veggies a little better this year. Last year there was too much planted in the plot and we had lettuce heads that were over 5 feet tall.

Mr. Bennett has been a very busy bee lately. He's walking all over the place and getting into trouble at every turn. Last night he ran straight for the TV and fell face first into the glass shelf on the entertainment center. He hit his head harder than he ever has before. There was a bleeding gash and it swelled up badly. Bernie was at work so I decided to take him to the immediate care. There was nothing wrong, but I don't think I would have slept wondering if he had a concussion or something. I'm sure it was the first of many many injuries. Mommy is just not ready for all of that.

Bernie is going to Boise at the end of March. I decided I didn't want to hang out alone for the week so I am taking Bennett up to Great Falls for a visit. I'm sort of looking forward to it. My mom is going to be very busy working and I don't want to be stranded at her house so I am in the process of trying to find a car to borrow. I hope to get more excited as the trip approaches.

I got my money back for the bootleg Beatles box set. The company never game me my money back but Amazon did. So consider this an official recommendation to do business with them. They treated me well and did the right thing.

Thank you goes out to Kristen and her sister Jaren for their contributions to the March for Dimes. Your generosity is amazing and very much appreciated.

Myles

Myles was the first preemie I "met" after we brought Bennett home. For the first month or so after he was born, I couldn't face any information about PE or preemies. It was so hard. But then I found Myles and his family and I started to realize how lucky we had been. Myles was born at 26 weeks due to preeclampsia. He lived for over three weeks. His parents faced many reproductive challenges including IVF and multiple misscarriages. They finally decided to pursue surrogacy and recently became parents to two beautiful twin boys, Liam and Silas. They were also preemies, born at about 34 weeks I believe. They are doing well and got to come home on Friday. Now Myles has two little brothers to watch over.

His story is included in a video on the sidebar. Make sure you have some tissues handy.

http://www.myjourneytomylesandbeyond.blogspot.com/

Courage after a loss

Many of the families I follow have lost a baby. Some of them try again while others do not. What they all have in common is the fear of going through it again, especially if they have had preeclampsia. The risks includes the mother as well as the baby. Jamie is a woman who is facing the risks again. She and her husband lost their baby boy Vincent at 22 weeks due to preeclampsia. They decided to try again and are currently 30 weeks pregnant with a second little boy. Jamie has been fighting the beginning symptoms of PE as well as gestational diabetes for a number of weeks now. She was again admitted to the hospital last night with likely PE. The doctors are hoping they can hold out a few more weeks, but must carefully balance Jamie's health as well as the baby's. Please send her some good vibes.

http://definingme-ramblingsofaneurotic.blogspot.com/

Tomorrow will be the final post on the subject of premature birth. You should check it out because you will meet the bravest family I have ever seen. Their story is the fist one I came across after Bennett and I return again and again to silently cheer them on.

Another Perspective

Preemies, especially micro-preemies present ethical issues to parents as well as the medical community. Babies born before 23 weeks have virtually zero chance of survival and those born between 23-26 weeks have low survival rates. Disability rates for all preemies is higher, but very high with babies born so early. There are questions surrounding too much intervention and the pain which these babies go through in order to survive. Some people are also concerned about the cost of these medically complicated babies. If Bennett's hospital stay (relatively uncomplicated) of 32 days cost almost $400,000, imagine the cost for a much smaller baby who needs many medical interventions and stays 100 days or more. It is uncomfortable to think of these issues, they cause dissonance in my own brain. I'm not sure where I stand on resuscitation before a certain number of weeks. Where do you draw the line? How much do these babies suffer? What would I do if faced with that situation? The answers are unclear for me.

The Preemie Experiment was created to educate the world about the long-term effects of prematurity. The posts are written by a woman who has two preemies (25 weeker and 34 weeker). She tackles these complicated ethical issues, although answers are difficult to come by. The comments on some of the posts are quite heated. I uncomfortably visit this site to learn from this experienced community and clarify my own values.

http://thepreemieexperiment.blogspot.com/

Loss

There are a number of blogs that I am following right now that feature brave families who have lost a baby after a premature birth. That all of these families lost their babies as a result of preeclampsia just shows my biased point of view. Premature births happen for many reasons and often the reason cannot be pinned down. A woman goes into labor early, it can't be stopped, and a preemie is born.

Ashley and her husband Chris had their son Nolan very early, 26 weeks I believe (forgive me Ashley, if I am wrong) due to preeclampsia. He fought a brave battle, but ultimately lost. If you have the time, check out his video on her sidebar and meet little Nolan.

http://rubybaby09.blogspot.com/

Featured Preemie

To coincide with our plan to walk the March of Dimes this year, I decided to post a daily feature for the next few days. One of the activities that occupies my time is following blogs of families with preemies. I came across most of these through my involvement with the Preeclampsia Foundation. Just in case you have never known someone who has experienced a premature birth, these blogs might give you a bit more insight and empathy into the world of these special families.

Fair warning: not all of these blogs are "happy endings." Premature babies don't always survive and those that do often have significant disabilities.

Today's blog is definitely about survival and meeting the challenges that come along with having not one, but two micro-preemies (usually defined as born before 29 weeks gestation and weighing less than 3 lbs, although the definition varies). Eden and Holland are miraculous. Meet them and their amazing family here:

http://micropreemietwins.blogspot.com/

March of Dimes

We have decided to walk for the March of Dimes. The reasons are surely obvious, but just in case someone missed it, Bennett was born at 31 weeks. I never even considered the possibility of a preemie until it happened to us. Spending 32 days in the NICU watching those tiny babies struggle was a life-changing experience. We were the lucky ones and I will never forget that. The March of Dimes supports families who face pre-term birth as well as the babies themselves.

So, if you have it in your budget (because I know you all have it in your hearts), please consider donating through the widget on my sidebar.

Stuff and stuff

First off, my exciting news for the day. I recently filled out an application to be a volunteer with the Preeclampsia Foundation. I got a mass email requesting people to edit stories, web content, etc and replied that I would love to help. Instead, they asked me if I wanted a larger role. I am now the baby fair coordinator for the region (CO, WY, ND, SD, MT, NB, and two Canadian provinces). The position is totally volunteer and involves working with PE survivors in those regions to get Foundation booths at local baby fairs to raise awareness. I may be able to run some myself in this area. I am so excited about this. I haven't volunteered since Eula died and this is the perfect opportunity to contribute to an organization that has done so much for me.

I don't know if I mentioned that I ordered the new Beatles box set. I got it from a third-party seller on Amazon for a really good price. The shipping was a mess and it was over a month before it arrived. I finally got it when we arrived home from Phoenix and started putting burning the songs onto my computer yesterday. I was suspicious of it from when I first took the plastic off and started taking the CD's out. It just seemed strange. Then I got to The White Album and discovered that there was only one CD (supposed to be a double). I got to looking closer and there were some CD's with unreadable track listings and even some typos (eg: Yellow Submarine was spelled "yillow"). I've been had with a bootleg copy of the box set. But it looks like either the company or Amazon will be refunding my money, but what a waste of time and energy. I'm going to take my 33% off coupon and buy it at Border's instead.

Bennett is in some sort of nap transition period. His morning nap was getting shorter and shorter, so we decided to try one nap yesterday. He only slept for an hour and a half but generally seemed fine with that. But then he woke up early this morning and was definitely ready to go down by 10am. I just put him down again because bedtime is too far away for such an early nap. So, we will take it day-by-day for now and see how it goes. I have a feeling it will be one nap one day and two the next for a bit.

I forgot to mention that my cousin Russell died before we went to Phoenix. He had had drug problems since he was a teenager and died of a methadone overdose. He left behind an 11 year old son. Sounds eerily like Marlena's ex Tad. I didn't make it to the funeral, but my mom did. That was the reason she ended up not being able to make it to Phoenix. It is such a terrible tragedy.